🐱 IT'S A CAT CAFE OPEN POST 🐱

[jammingway]

Whoever you are, wherever you're from, sometimes you just want to hang out in a room full of cats. Sometimes all you need is a hot drink and a little space to relax. And sometimes, you want both of these at the same time. Good thing you found your way here, to the chillest cat cafe in the multiverse! Part eatery, part adoption centre, part kitschy plush decor, kittens, senior cats, longhairs, shorthairs, all cats all the time.

On posters around the cafe walls, the rules:

🐈 Do not feed the cats! No matter how much they beg for it!
🐈 Do not push the cats off of chairs or equipment! The equipment is not for customers! Even if you are also a cat.
🐈 Do not carry hot food or drinks around the cafe - there are tables for that!
🐈 Do not pick up the cats or wake sleeping cats!
🐈 No flash photography.
🐈 If a member of staff notices you breaking any of these rules, they will ask you to leave.

PURROMPTS

1. FIRST VISIT. Never been to one of these establishments before? That's okay, there's always a friendly staffer around to show you to a seat, point you to the restrooms, demonstrate how to play with a cat wand, gently encourage you to buy drinks - perhaps you'll meet someone else in the same boat?


2. REGULAR CUSTOMER. You know the drill, they know how you take your coffee and the cats know your scent. Fortunately, there's always some new kind of trouble to watch the cats get into.


3. EMPLOYEE. Someone has to make the drinks, feed the cats and clean up after the messier patrons. The pay is decent, but as with any service job, the customers can be a Russian (Blue) roulette at times.


4. RISK TAKER, RULE BREAKER. Perhaps that less than model customer is you. How can you resist surrendering a bite of your salad to these big round kitten eyes? What if you simply have to scoop up one of these beautifully soft fuzzballs in your arms? Well, just don't get caught.


5. ADOPTION DRIVE. Today, volunteers from the local cat rescue have set up a stall and some pamphlets inside the building, just in case you were on the fence about taking one of these kitties home. And if you're up for giving one of them a home, why not two? Here, take this Kitty Starter Kit bag full of toys and treats while you're at it.


6. UNUSUAL CAT. There are more kinds of cats who need homes than your standard street moggies. Is that a velvety-smooth Cornish Rex purring in the corner over there? A hyperactive Bengal kitten zooming across the cat shelves? ...A bobcat??


7. WILDCA(T)RD. It's cats! Cats cats cats.

Comments

Yotsuyu | FFXIV | OTA

[tsukinohiganbana]

Rose (WoL OC) | FFXIV | OTA

[poisontippedcure]

Sans | Undertale | ota

[seriff]

A:

[No matter how often you come to this cafe, there are times when you just need to quickly get the attention of an assistant for some reason or another. And at some of those times, you'll turn to the closest person wearing something like the employee uniform, only to find that they are... a skeleton?? Yes, something that looks very much like an upright human skeleton in a grimy apron, the cat-shaped employee badge taped at a careless angle to its forehead.

There don't seem to be any other staff members around right now. Hopefully this isn't too indicative of the food hygiene around here.]

B:

[The rules of this cafe stipulate that nobody except the cats is allowed to climb on the various cat staircases, cat shelves and cat trees adorning the back of the place. There is no rule against lying on the floor. Therefore, Sans has no reason to feel guilty about doing just that and dozing off in the warm sunlight. ...Not that he would either way.

He's snoring quietly, which is not a sound commonly associated with skeletons. One of the smaller, bolder kittens in the room is already rounding on him, sniffing curiously at his exposed femurs. Maybe this isn't the best place for a skeleton to be napping...]

C: [wildcard me up y'all]

Joscelaint Grimpevers (WoL OC) | FFXIV | Closed because I don't actually know what I'm doing

[bythefurry]

[Franternet had promised him a good time.

Being alone in the middle of a bar full of baby coeurls was not, in fact, his idea of a good time.

Of course, he should have guessed it'd be something like this. Why did he even trust Franternet? The man had terrible opinions about everything and a strange obsession with coeurl pictures captioned with nonsense such as "I must needs a cheese sandwich." Of course, blowing off his suggestion would have been terribly rude, but... surely, he could have found a way to avoid this entire situation. Surely.

To top it off, the others were late, and he'd been awkwardly sitting in a chair clearly not made for someone of his height for a good 30 minutes, alone at a table designed for at least four people. Another customer glared at him from across the room and he felt his heartbeat pick up. Were they judging him for hogging up such a big table by himself? Oh no.

Anyway, he had trouble understanding the concept behind this place. Who would want to hang out with coeurls? They were quite feral and- oh, oh dear. Was this one rolling on the ground, making contented chirping noises? It would be almost cute, if they didn't grow up to become vicious predators big enough to swallow a Lalafell whole.

Perhaps thankfully, this train of thought was interrupted when a very small feline jumped onto the table... almost knocking down his cup of coffee in the process.]

O-oh no, no no no-

[He quickly snatched the cup away, extending his arm over his head so that the creature couldn't get to it.]

[playbuoy]

[Alisaie never having been one for unnecessary words, her description had given Alphinaud only the vaguest image of what to expect from the but newly opened establishment she'd suggested they meet at. That said, Joscelaint had not featured prominently in it. Alphinaud was hard pressed to imagine the kind of cafe or bar where Joscelaint would feature prominently... or any location, come to think. Joss was a classical shrinking violet, if violets grew to be about half a malm tall. And yet there his prominent friend was - Alphinaud could see his head sticking out above the mostly-Hyur coeurl-appreciating crowd from the moment he walked in.]

Joscelaint! I confess, this is unexpected.

[Flashing Joss a sheepish smile, he quickened his pace towards the table. Perhaps his surprise did Joss an injustice. Even the vaunted Warrior of Light had days off in between all the godslaying, so why not spend one of them in a cafe? Come to think, was it possible Alisaie had planned this before requesting this rendezvous...?

But before Alphinaud could follow this train of thought to its potentially ego-bruising conclusion, disaster struck! Taking the form of a tiny, boisterous creature leaping into Joss's aggro zone. The look on Joscelaint's face was almost contagious... No, hold it together, Alphinaud! This is your chance to be helpful!]

Ah, don't panic! I'll divert it -

[Tiny hiss! Tiny slash! Critical hit!]

Ow!

[He let go of the indignant kitten almost as soon as he'd grabbed for it, instead lowering his hackles to nurse the fresh gash on his hand.]

[bythefurry]

[Joscelaint's first thought was "Thank the Fury, someone familiar," followed by a small look of relief on his oft tense face.

A short-lived relief, as it were, as his second thought was a panicky "oh no" when Alphinaud's hand fell in battle to the vicious, fuzzy beast.]

Ah! [He quickly set his cup down, somehow not spilling a drop despite the speed of the gesture - although it was easy to forget, he was a dragoon gifted with a swift, precise hand - and shot up from his seat, all seven fulms of his being unfolding like one of Cid Garlond's fancy Ironworks weapons.

He immediately regretted it, as the scraping of the chair and the rush of coeurls running away from the sudden appearance of this strange man-tree both drew gazes to his table. His shoulders settled into their customary hunch, and he turned his attention back to his smaller friend.]

Are you all right? I do believe I have a potion somewhere- [He looked around for his bag for a second, before remembering two crucial facts: first, that he'd left said bag on his chocobo, and second, that Alphinaud was an arcanist and therefore quite capable of healing himself.] Ah, although I suppose... Physick should be more than enough for such a wound...

[Oh dear, he'd gone and made a fool of himself again.

He sat back down much slower than he got up, awkwardness written all over his face. He was fairly sure Alphinaud was used to his mediocre people skills at this point, but it was still rather embarrassing. What if someone recognized him, and spread the (accurate) word that the Warrior of Light was an easily flustered bundle of nerves? What if they realized their hero really wasn't all that great at, well, anything? He never wanted to become a symbol, but now that he was... he couldn't just disappoint people, could he?

Well, he could start by not being rude to Alphinaud by forcing him to stand there like an idiot for bells on end. He used an elongated arm to wordlessly draw a chair for the teen, replying to his earlier sheepish smile with one of his own.]

[playbuoy]

[Seeing Joss all but jump out of his chair, Alphinaud has to fight the urge to jump in surprise himself. Still, it's hard to take the diplomat out of Alphinaud even if one takes Alphinaud out of his element, and so he hastily waves away Joss's obvious apprehension, ignoring the stinging.] Pray settle down! You well know 'tis but a scratch.

[...He is still going to chance another furtive glance around the vicinity before taking that seat. No, not even a hint of a sign of his sister's presence. He's been standing here an entire minute and nobody has insulted him yet, unless the baby coeurl counts. Hmm.]

If, admittedly, another surprise I'd not anticipated. [He looks up at Joscelaint meaningfully.] I had expected to rendezvous with my sister here...

[Have you seen her, Joss. Did she set him up again.]

[bythefurry]

[Joscelaint, too, nervously glances around for signs of Alphinaud's twin. This sudden development seems to be as much of a surprise for him as it is for the teen.]

I was not aware Alisaie would be here. I was, um, led to believe this would be a meeting of the [He slightly pauses, as if embarrassed by what he's about to say.] "old guard." For "old times' sake."

[Although his hands don't move an ilm, the air quotes are all but implied.

He quickly adds:]

To quote Franternet.

[So Swaegyrnwist, Fhri, and Franternet himself. The small, core group of people who've been with him since nearly the beginning of his adventuring career. And while he has never known the latter two to be particularly punctual, the old man is usually quite a bit more on time than this.

Joss suddenly finds himself filled with a sense of dread, a breathy exclamation escaping his lips.]

By the Fury! You don't believe the two of them could be... conspiring, do you?

[A truly horrifying prospect.]

[playbuoy]

...A possibility I find myself loath to dismiss.

[He sighs a little, finally settling down onto the proffered chair. He does feel strangely tired all of a sudden. It's not like he doesn't still have to crane his neck to look at Joss while standing, anyway.]

But if so, the question of why confounds me. I'd heard that the Ala Mhigan Resistance continues to sue for a peace agreement with the Qalyana and other neighbouring races, but not of meaningful further developments for the time being. [This is the reason Joss is friends with him, right?] Indeed, I thought you deserved more of a rest before concerning yourself with such affairs again - several times over, in fact! That being the case, we...

[He flinches, visibly and quite unintentionally. The kitten he dropped is already back on the table, advancing on Joscelaint's hands with suspiciously wide-eyed curiosity.]

Ah. It... seems to have taken a liking to you.

[Please don't turn and scratch him again. He needs his vocal chords for exposition.]

[bythefurry]

[As Alphinaud launches into his little speech, Joscelaint's face switches to the dead-eyed expression of a man used to hiding his inner turmoil behind a stoic mask. Was this meeting supposed to be political in nature? It doesn't match with what Franternet had suggested to him, and yet... if Alisaie truly is involved, then it must be a matter of some import, isn't it? Alphinaud doesn't seem to think it yet another ill-advised prank, and Joss - for better or worse - trusts the teen's judgment. Did he, somehow, completely misconstrue his friend's words?

Oh no.

Sadly, any attempt at clearing things up doesn't go further than Joss opening his mouth to speak. It looks like Alphinaud's vocal chords are safe for now; the kitten is positively enthralled with Joss's long fingers, its rear twitching slightly every time the tall elezen makes at attempt at grabbing his cup.

It's after several such attempts, accompanied by increasingly distressed "ah" and "um"s, that Joss finally manages to reply.]

I... cannot imagine why. I've little skill for animal handling.

[Except when it comes to murdering them in droves, but killing a baby coeurl for being too playful seems a tad excessive.]

walder | granblue fantasy | ota

[whereswalder]

Revali | Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild | ota

[justasinine]

izuku midoriya | bnha

[uglycry]

idfk w/e

[allpunchman]

[As a pro, even a former pro, All Might wouldn't normally let himself be cornered in public places like this cafe. Mass media is everywhere, and these days the questions they would ask aren't the kind he has stock answers for yet. As a teacher, on the other hand, sometimes you find yourself unexpectedly needing to discuss curricula with a colleague or two - and sometimes, the colleague you need seems to have vanished into thin air, leaving his sleeping bag in the faculty office.

Being a teacher is hard. :(

Truth be told, he hasn't set foot in this cafe before, although he's commuted past it often enough. It seems like a nice place, judging by the warm atmosphere, the smiles on the faces of the patrons and the contented felines lolling around in the back. What it does not currently contain is Shota Aizawa, which means All Might is all set to back out of here and try elsewhere.

That is, before he catches sight of a different familiar face.]

Ah, if it isn't young Midoriya! You look well.

[He has to flash the boy a smile, with the bright ease of a performer who has a lot of experience hiding their own embarrassment. His fidgeting with the smartphone in his bony hands might give him away, though.]

[uglycry]

[ Izuku simply couldn't help himself when he heard his classmates talking about the cat cafe. With everyone furiously working in their internships, Izuku is happy to have a day for himself. Admittedly, he feels a pang of guilt -- he should be studying, training, practicing -- but instead he's treating himself to a mug of sweet, milky tea and a visit with the cats.

He's only just received his drink, the warm mug pressed carefully between his palms, when he hears an all-too-familiar voice. Which may well make him yelp, flail his newly prepared tea all over his front and the floor. (Thankfully, he narrowly misses a splotchy, round cat that strolls by with a bored squeak. ]

A-ah! [ A hero he might be one day, but a soggy, flailing mess of a student he is now. ] All Might! [ Another flail, as he tries to find a place to sit the dripping mug. ] Aah, hot, hot, hot...

[allpunchman]

[Ah, and suddenly the boy looks somewhat less well. He should have expected that.]

Hey! Calm down. [Ignoring the trickle of blood that escaped his mouth in his own surprise, All Might plants a hand on Izuku's shoulder and does his best to forcibly point him towards the closest empty table - okay, empty except for a snoozing black longhair draped over half of it, but close enough. (Perhaps Eraser was here earlier and felt so comfortable that he turned into one of the cats?)] And quiet down, while you're at it.

[uglycry]

[ Whoops, there he goes, making a fool of himself in front of All Might again. He's had many conversations with his mentor and teacher, but it never takes away the awe Izuku feels in his presence. He will never shake the nerves or the excitement that comes with being in the presence of the number one hero.

But he listens and stumbles to the table, careful not to drop the hot drink on the cat who, disturbed by a visitor, glares at him with half-lidded eyes. ] A-ah... right, sorry! [ He shakes his hands, fingers lightly burned by the drink. ] I didn't think I'd see any of our teachers here! [ He didn't think YOU'D be here, All Might, but if All Might likes cats, and Izuku likes cats, that's one more thing they have in common, right?! ]

[wigging]

You really think he'll be here?

[ So maybe the elder Kageyama has gone missing. Well, Teru tries not to use that word where Ritsu is involved, knowing that the implication of missing is a little too serious for their problem right now. Mob isn't answering his phone, and while that could mean he's just busy with the body improvement club somewhere or tagging along on a stupid job with that hack psychic, it's still cause for concern.

But a cat cafe was as likely a place to find Mob than anywhere else. ] Does he like cats that much?